This blog was started five years ago tomorrow, so I am revisiting some of the core principles I hold in the hope you may better understand the importance of my mission. It is no coincidence that on most of the planet right now it is a Double Monday.
Whilst consumerist morons are waylaid by Valentine's Day, avid readers of this blog will know that Tuesday is Double Monday and is inherently and utterly evil. What you may not know is why I have been on a mission to destroy this day since the dawn of my time....
Double Monday
For most people, Monday is seen as the worst day of the week. It's the day when you trudge along to your office, school or place of total repression, leaving behind the dull placid tones of your homely lives. Bob Geldof even wrote a song about Monday's in the 1979 Boom Town Rat's hit "I don't like Monday's" (2). But if you were to question your assumption and prejudices to the day dedicated to the moon God, Luna, you would soon realise that this whole Moonday thing is a big sham. There is nothing wrong with Monday's, nor can there be because it is after the Sun[god]s day.
Whilst Monday may represent the first day of a long week, where no one really likes going back to school or work, at least it’s the first day, a fresh start. You can catch up with friends, colleagues and enemies again and have something to say. You are somewhat refreshed after the weekend excess (or at least you can tell stories about your debauchery). By Wednesday you are half way through the week so it’s getting bearable. Thursday you are so close you can almost taste the weekend and by Friday you know it’s only a few short hours left to go until party/down time.
On a Tuesday (1), you look at the same annoying faces you saw just yesterday that have absolutely nothing more of interest to say to you, that now taunt you by their very being and you still have the whole fucking week to go! Think of it this way after Tuesday you get WTF. It's hardly surprising it's often called Double Monday.
A Brief History
Tuesday as we know it in the English language, derives from the Norse word “Tiwesdaeg” named after the Norse God of War, Tyr or Tir. The Norse Vikings, on one of their surfing excursions to the Sceptred Bastard Isles, decided to hijack the Roman day for the God of War, Mars. Hence in French, Tuesday is known as Merdi, Martedi in Italian and Martes in Spanish accordingly. So although the very mention of the word “Tuesday” chills me to the bones and scares the pants off Cosmetic Brain Surgery, it’s not the word itself that I have issues with, I want the entire day banished never to return under any given name!
But there's more to this Tuesday thing than my inane hatred of the day. A study (3) found that people are more likely to commit suicide on a Monday. Now whilst this may seem to completely debunk my Tuesday theory, you would be wrong. Very, very wrong. Think about this for a moment. Why do people kill themselves on a Monday? "Researchers said the trend was not solely a result of returning to work as it was replicated for retired people. Instead, they said the pattern - gleaned from 34,935 deaths from 1993 to 2002 - was likely to be down to a sense of unease over starting something new." (4) How much more obvious could it be? By killing yourself on a Monday you don't have to face a Tuesday!
Conspiracy
The powers that be over the years have tried to cloud the horrendous truth of this dark day, making up a wealth of festivals, rituals and who knows what else so that we get so bladdered and inhibit our instinctive capacity to comprehend anything beyond breathing. These include: Mardi Gras (also known as Fat, Pancake/Shrove Tuesday) where you stuff your little fat faces silly and then ritually and sadistically deprive yourself of chips and chocolate for a few weeks afterwards in some quasi religious penance of self flagellation; “Super Tuesday”, where the United States goes through the charade of a “democratic” election and yet still goes for the blue blood time after time (5), Suicide Tuesday, which happens after a weekend necking small pills of the type not prescribed by your doctor where the comedown gives you the clarity of mind to realise with mortal terror and impending doom, that it's a Tuesday. As I showed above, mankind would rather kill themselves rather than face Double Monday. For heaven’s sake they even allow Christmas to fall on a Tuesday every few years*! If I can dig deep enough I am sure I will find Masonic origins for Tuesday, which would explain a lot and bring countless conspiracy theorists onboard.
Frigin Missons
Tuesday is symbolically and diabolically evil. Intrinsically we know in our hearts and souls that this day is fundamentally wrong. When you look back in time there are so many infamous Tuesday's in the history of our so called civilisation;
- The Fall of Constantinople occurred on Tuesday, 29th May 1453. As a result the Greeks consider Tuesday to be an unlucky day.
- There is a Spanish proverb "En martes, ni te cases ni te embarques " which translates as "On Tuesday, neither get married nor begin a journey".
- Tuesday, 15th December 1791 - U.S. Bill of Rights signed.
- Tuesday, 28th February 1854 - Republican Party formally organised.
- Tuesday, 26th January 1875 - Dentist's electric drill patented
- Tuesday, October 29th 1929 - Black Tuesday referred to as the worst day in stock market history where “The Little Man” lost his life savings whilst the fat cats had taken the money and run weeks beforehand.
- 11th September 1973, the first 9/11 and a dark day in Chile's history.
- 11th September 2001 - the most famous 9/11, also a Tuesday, and that has the friggin missons written all over it (see I told you if I dug hard enough I'd find Masonic origins).**
I can see as I write this that you are still not convinced. After all isn’t Tuesday’s child "full of grace"? Well to be honest, no! It is no coincidence that most Traffic Wardens and Dictators were born on a Tuesday. Those great luminaries born on this day include; Margaret Thatcher, Chairman Mao Tse-Tung, Ferdinand Marcos and erm….Margaret Thatcher. All mad as hatters and hell bent on ruining your life in anyway possible. So although my argument is on shaky ground here especially as I can’t think of any dictators who were actually born on a Tuesday, many great dictators were born on a Monday (Kim Il Sung and Ronald Reagan) or a Wednesday (Saddam and Ayatollah Khomeini), due to the International Date Line it was more than likely a Tuesday somewhere on the planet which is good enough for me. It is of note that Richard Branson, Jean-Claude Van Damme and Anne Robinson were born on a Tuesday and I hope that for many of you, this will be reason enough to convince you to join my anti-Tuesday campaign.
If these facts are still not enough for you then I implore you to look at some of the sites that get thrown up when you do an internet search on "Tuesday Conspiracy". in fact you don't even need the "Conspiracy" bit, just try Tuesday an broand you find something as insidious as firsttuesday.com. At first glance you would be excused for thinking this is an ordinary business forum, but if you question yourself then there is no way anything remotely associated with Tuesday could be innocent. This company, set up in the same year as 9/11, not only openly flaunts its global alliances that have "City leaders" that communicate "throughout the world", it openly flaunts the name Tuesday all over its website in the same way the Illuminati/Masons symbols of the pyramid and all seeing eye are flaunted on the US dollar bill as any Dan Brown readers amongst you must know (and therefore must be true).
Bastards!
Bearing all this in mind, it is only logical that those born on this day can be nothing other than complete and utter bastards. Being born on a Tuesday means you emerge kicking, screaming and subconsciously trying to wage war on the rest of the world, Mother Nature and anyone not called Bob for the rest of your life. You would be better off bearing the mark of the Antipodean Beast. Why? Because you were born on the most spiteful day of the week ever created, worse than Bastarday (6) which lasted less than twelve hours (7), worse than a Sunday morning hangover after drinking battery acid from a green plastic bottle and then eating genetically mutated organisms at the 'House of Babylon' kebab house W7, and it's worse even than knowing you are related to a chimpanzee that takes photos of himself peeling his banana in the bathroom and then gets you to develop the negatives in well known High Street Chemists that likes reporting strange images to the police and putting you on the same registers as Gary Glitter.
Tuesday is a truly horrible creation and we should either declare Tuesday a world holiday (followed by three days of mourning WTF) or banish it forever.
Do not believe what you are told, fight to rid the world of Double Monday's and forget all this crap about overthrowing your governments. They are powerless and only obey the orders or those beholden to Double Monday. The Campaign to Ban Tuesdays goes on.......... start your local chapter now! Details on how to set up your own chapter will appear soon eventually.
(1) I apologise profusely to my fellow anti-tuesdians for the repeated use of the word ‘T***day’ (capitalised form). In order to spread the word to the Infidels I feel we must make this small sacrifice.
(2) The author is aware the song actually about something else but we won't go there now. However since Sir Bob Geldof was born on a Tuesday it would not take a Eureka moment to work out that this was merely a diversion. He is a bastard - as shown by his major wimp out on making poverty disappear from our televisions for another few years.
(3) "The Office for National Statistics found 16% of male suicides and 17% of female suicides occurred on Mondays, compared to 13% on the weekend days!". BBC News Online 25th August 2005
(5) According to "Genealogical sources, like the New England Historical Genealogical Society and Burkes Peerage, 33 of the 42 presidents to Clinton are related to Charlemagne and 19 are related to England's Edward III, both of whom are of this bloodline. A spokesman for Burkes Peerage, the bible of royal and aristocratic genealogy based in London, has said that "every presidential election since and including George Washington in 1789 has been won by the candidate with the most royal genes"", See Burke's Peerage for further information.
(6) A Brief History of Bastardshire by Craig Mitchell.
(7) in the Medieval settlement of Bastardshire and named after Bob the Bastard who was disemboweled at 7:11 pm the same day just after the moonshine blew up
* This is very, very important. I will reveal more later, however the clues have already been published on this site for those able to decipher my warbling.
** Don't even bother accusing me of insensitivity. Search 911 and see if it doesn't come up with links between the masons and any other black ops linked group you can think of.
2 comments:
You've done well to elude a mental assessment test for five years. Enjoy the privileges of youth for suddenly the retributive forces of evil will get square with you for the error of thinking a few days of happiness had escaped attention.
State police collude with ASIO whose Inspector General (Yes Mavis, it's not only a stage play)boasts on ABC TV that skeleton keys allow penetration into any structure and mind worldwide.
The cops and the bike fraternity fractured over territory issues, so now old stand-over practices like consorting and extra powers to silence blog-site pensioners by an accidental blow to the head are being resurrected.
Your observation that olds are generating treasonable thoughts really justifies their being arbitrarily brought to heel. The dirty filthy old cunts think they should be treated as normals. Authorities in this country agree that depriving this scum of their liberties has been long overdue and a systemic tidying-up is underway.
Been in this spot for a few hours, so must pack-up and go off-air. Cheers, lesjohns.wordpress.com
Thanks Les. Avoided the test only by flying under the radar of the so called sane. I also support the extreme measures to solve our problems rather than bleating like a communist rat. Liberties, hard fought and hard one are frittered away by the NIMBYs happy to marvel at the cages put around them to keep safe from the imaginary world they fear.
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