Blackhole? Bermuda Triangle? Has Porn Solved the Missing Airline Mystery?

This has come in over the wire

The Twitter account of US Airways crashed into a black hole of unknown origin, possibly due to a lack of a landing strip

Bermuda Triangle?
The full unadulterated image 

cc_rider: Damn... I think they just figured out what happened to that missing 777.

Whatthefark: This raises the question, has Malaysia Airlines checked all vaginas for the missing plane? If they have, what were the results? If they haven't, then why not. Cover up? Was it found in the vagina of Malaysia Airlines owner's wife? Were multiple pieces found in multiple vaginas? Farking source

This is an interesting proposition and not without merit, however to accommodate a fully grown aeroplane we need a bigger pussy. 

According to very reliable sources the world's biggest pussy was 19 inches and belonged to Scottish giantess Anna Swan who stood at 7' 8" tall. Now whilst this is impressive, a fifty foot woman could only have a pussy of about 10 feet, leaving us 50% short of the 20 ft 4 in needed to accommodate a Boeing 777*. This leaves us with the sticky problem of locating a hundred foot woman who happens to be swimming somewhere in the Southern oceans with her legs akimbo - which considering they can't even track a plane, leaves us not much hope. Even for me this is stretching (!) it a bit - even considering the horrendous behaviour of airlines which I have may have ranted about before and possibly before that too.

Avid readers should know that I was always more likely to be sold on the floating island with black smoke hypothesis as an explanation. Further, all this sonar malarkey is actually the continued effort to locate the Kraken - whom the Auzzies were previously trying to bomb in his stronghold of the Great Barrier Reef [in an effort to flush him out and scare him back to his Mediterranean home]. Indeed, it is entirely plausible that MH370 is Beijing used as an anal plug for the Kraken. 

Peoples of Earth, there has been much foul air expelled by the many arseholes in the media over this missing plane and therefore as quasi-journalist I feel it is quite right to speculate endlessly and without foundation. Besides, triangles and black holes can be easily confused in the dark.

* Note the sacredness of these numbers adding up to 21 which is half of the sacred 42 which controls life, the universe and everything.