Saturday, 7 July 2012

Old Age Terrorists #21 Reclaim Ram Raiding

Do we wait until there's nothing left in the bank?
Old people do your duty for your country.
Open Season on the bankers has been declared. Underneath the media sensationalism and faux political rage at the bloody bankers we see the whole edifice crumbling. With hyper inflation, anarchy and the Kraken visiting coastal Europe being just around the corner, it can only be a matter of time before the extreme measures that are needed to save us from the precipice will be welcomed by the mewling cabbages. Instead of allowing such evil forces to fly above our heads at five am on a Sunday morning because Heathrow has issues with it's penis size, we must embrace the spirit of ancient volcano gods and sacrifice.

My idea of reintroducing Fox Hunting replacing foxes with Conservative MPs, was sadly not taken up by the Coalition, however. They have taken the spirit of my policy ideas to heart and have substituted their place [of being grossly unfit and detested by the people] with bankers fresh from their bonuses. Someone always has to take flack and these fattened calves are now being prepared for the greatest televisual spectacle of all time.*
"Stand ye calm and resolute,
Like a forest close and mute,
With folded arms and looks which are
Weapons of unvanquished war.
And if then the tyrants dare,
Let them ride among you there,
Slash, and stab, and maim and hew,
What they like, that let them do.
With folded arms and steady eyes,
And little fear, and less surprise
Look upon them as they slay
Till their rage has died away
Then they will return with shame
To the place from which they came,
And the blood thus shed will speak
In hot blushes on their cheek.
Rise like Lions after slumber
In unvanquishable number,
Shake your chains to earth like dew
Which in sleep had fallen on you-
Ye are many — they are few
I, GingerZilla, PLEDGE to the People that:
Ram Raiding on banks, will no longer be deemed a criminal offence. 
This is clearly consumer choice, an exercise of  consumer rights and requires only minor modifications to existing law by applying the principle of fairness previously bestowed upon the bankers to the bastard oiks. If the banks won't loan us the money then we must reclaim it in the name of these sacred Islands, just in case the KRAKEN comes looking for some Olympic Gold. After Spain winning something** they at last have something worthy to offer to the Kraken who will collect the souls of their winning team and devour them. This will allow them to be spared Spain's fate by moving en mass to the Premier League when the wage structure collapses because of the militant actions of communist rats in the media.

In the spirit to embrace modern forms of communication we can broadcast bank raiding every Friday and Saturday night after the pubs close, bringing families back together. This is quite Zen if used correctly and doesn't involve Rupe the Antipodean Beast trying to perform osmosis on our consciousness by buying up the rights to the series and spoiling it for anyone without a connection to the turdfest. We must face harsh realities now that we are broken morally, spiritually and financially. I have come to tell you that it does not have to be this way, there are always choices.
Every so often we could have Celebrity specials where the once famous but now bitter and old get their moment to shine in front of the nation once more who will be cheering their honourable deaths sacrifice.

In recent news, the Police have predicted they fear more Riots as this could really annoy the Kraken as he doesn't like rowdy locals. In most probability he doesn't like anyone, except for the chosen few who bear his golden tithe[i]. This could explain why despite the miserable weather that clings to these Bastard Isles they pray for the heavens to long rain over us and keep the Bastard Oiks indoors watching Big Brother whilst Big Brother watches them.

* so far. I hope to persuade this government of the merits of burning old peoples in the hope of dissuading them from their misguided attempts to punish just the poor and infirm. All it takes is the application of one word 'old' into the policy schedules and the impact on the economy will be tremendous. The Kraken will be pleased at the extreme lengths we have gone to usher in this great age of austerity and we'll be happy as long as we don't freeze our arses off.
** thank heavens they won and summoned the Kraken. We can only hope this distracts him whilst the Olympics are on.
[ii] less a six percent administration fee to cover operational costs, mainly coffee as long as it has nothing to do with Starbucks.

BROTHER BOB should remember The Stew of Corruption as told by Craig Murray,
“British democracy has lost its meaning. The political and economic system has come to serve the interests of a tiny elite, vastly wealthier than the run of the population, operating through corporate control. The state itself exists to serve the interests of these corporations, guided by a political class largely devoid of ideological belief and preoccupied with building their own careers and securing their own finances….
bankers' bonus season is upon us again and these facilitators of trade and manufacture are again set to award themselves tens of billions of pounds to swell the already huge bank accounts of a select few, whose lifestyle and continued employment is being subsidised by every single person in the UK with 8% of their income. This was because the system which rewards those bankers so vastly is fundamentally unsound and largely unnecessary. Money unlinked to trade or manufacture cannot create infinite value; that should have been known since the South Sea Bubble.”

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