#ComicRelief Fat Australians to Donate Fuel

Beaudesert Local (left) pictured with Les.

As avid readers will know I accumulated an online stalker in my divine quest to solve the many ailments of our modern age. I have become rather fond of his territorial pissings on the deserved targets of his ire - that and the great distance between us of course.


There is also the advantage of Les not being an amphorous fat blob with a bucket of fried chicken under one arm and a bucket of tokens under t'other. No leader, no matter how fanatical, can be a slave to ideology. This form of Realpolitik is why you can fight Al-falafel with words and bombs, yet still pay for the AK47 bill so they can at least shoot the locals as consolation.

Although still unpopular, thanks to the efforts of liberals also known as communist rats who in truth desire only that a liberal is the one bombing the hoards of darkies from Bongo Bongo land, my policies of burning oldies is gaining traction. Behold;

*Winter fuel allowance to be replaced by flammable obese benefit claimants.

Following is my reply to the above Twitter entry. It was far too long for Twitter. I joined my blog friend GingerZilla in pushing for something like this a year or so back. It seems a resource waste to be expelled from crematoria chimneys. Bringing this about would be fair recompense for the selfish opinions, foul smell and the objectionable behaviour of these tubbies. Even the extraordinary precious Bowen Hills journalist, Syvret, commented on the thoughtlessness of pensioners who slowed shopping aisle traffic when they stopped to exchange greetings. There are a few amiable, obese mining types in Australia who would probably donate their blubber to comfort those whose poor little hands are cold.