Showing posts with label FootballZilla. Show all posts
Showing posts with label FootballZilla. Show all posts

Thursday, 12 January 2012

Scotland to be Privatised*

Wanted for Crimes Against the Union
Links with far right?

"Alas, I have often said to myself what are the boasted advantages which my country reaps from a certain Union that counterbalance the annihilation of her Independence, and even her name !" 
Scotland, a place where there are twice as many Panda's as there are Conservative Members of Parliament, may be punished for the indiscretion of A Salmon as dark forces threaten to tear the union apart. Rumours have circulated about affairs and rumours persist that our former friends in the North are conspiring with those even further North. Even if these rumours are found to be just that - rumours - sources have said they may just privatise Scotland to bind them to the Union as it would offend God to break the union, and  let's face it, it's only fair that someone makes a profit. As it is, one set of two-timing bastards have accused the other half** of vile things and expect them to lie down and take the abuse. However asking any Scot to lie down and think of England is hardly going to get them in the mood for getting into bed, especially, as history tells us, when there's no gold involved.

Thursday, 15 December 2011

Badger Caught in Honey Trap

troops blamed for 'badger' plague

Honninggraevling
Sounds 
lydmalende [onomatopoeic]
This is an outrage! Even if this Daily Telegraph story is over four years why should I be excluded from showing rage now that I've just found out? The media are full of such story rehashing and as a proud but unemployed tabloid journo wannabe, I claim the right to follow in their footsteps by staying at home or going down the pub. How else am I expected to find sources? Right now I am stuck indoors. It is not safe to go out due to the incoming threat from the North and the cold winds are blowing hard over these Bastard Isles.

Monday, 14 November 2011

Advert Break: Sir Joseph Barton vs The Human Slug Piers Morgan


Like Hannibal Lecter,
Hugh Fernley-Whittingstall would probably eat your mother
But even he was not able to stomach a slug.
Most people can't stomach Piers Morgan.

Sunday, 13 November 2011

ADVERT BREAK: Even More Panda Love

Panda's are Zen. You do not mess with them.


And you do not question my predictive and proven power of understanding the cosmic riddle of 42 and 12:12. Do not doubt Agent Bob. I have sources everywhere and I prepare to make this truly the season of goodwill:

Thursday, 29 September 2011

Advert Break: FootballZilla

Although if I am honest it does involve a staggeringly implausible series of connections that are statistically possible. 42 is involved.

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