Thursday, 10 May 2012

Police Strike to Help Hard up Public


Hidden amongst all the panic over pasties and petrol is a very real threat of general strike infiltrating the police. As anyone who has ever seen Robocop, the thought of a strike by the rank and file police would introduce anarchy to every street across these Bastard Isles. Instead of shaking down this corrupt profession (as corrupt as any profession with power) to root out the bad seeds and making sure they are well paid, I decided to look at the view from the plod first
Recent events have shown that the thought of a police strike would not induce panic buying ahead of potential riots that may be brought on by the strike. *Why would the English public panic buy goods when they can wait for the start of the strike and help themselves to shop contents for free? townpoliceclauses
These people were at the forefront of the petrol shortage that never was. The anarchy, mainly driven by old people plotting against us, was spread to the general pubic via a government statement, which to all intents and purposes highly resembles the wettest drought on record statement with a few minor tweaks to the wording.
I spoke to the owner of my local garage earlier today. He has 8 pumps on the forecourt, “as a rule” his underground storage is around 33% full, he orders a tanker delivery when it hits 10% full (this would be a 5 day supply). If he were to completely fill his underground storage he estimates he would have 2 weeks supply at normal rates of consumption…. to do so would cost him nearly £250,000, which, unsurprisingly given the 2.12% profit margin on fuel, he doesn’t have on hand.

He could take out a short term loan to fill those storage tanks, but the bank are unwilling to lend it to him at less than 5%… or more than the profit he would make from selling the fuel unless he massively increased prices (at which point he would be seen as “profiteering” and lose the good will of his customers… and he’s not the only garage in town, so why the hell would he risk that?).

Instead of sensible questions around making contingency plans, offering short-term loans to independent garage owners (or forcing our state-owned bank to do so), ensuring our emergency services have enough reserves etc etc etc first they incite panic buying without any reasonable justification, then backtrack once the damage is done. Meanwhile Labour take a break from being photographed in every Greggs in the country to rip Maude to shreds for not knowing exactly what a Jerry can is rather than suggesting anything remotely sensible to calm people down and deal with the reality of the situation. Steve Evans
This is quite an average run of the mill story that the mainstream media can't be bothered to report on as they'd rather have us jack off to celebrities.
My source, known only as Scarlet Pimple revealed the FutureHistory of his Masters of the Force
At least we have management being consistent. I recall my Met Masters issuing identical advice in 1956 when we had our little foray into the land of the Pharoes. Then again in 1973, they got out their John Bull Printing Outfits and issued identical advice to accompany The Yom Kippur adventures. A lot of money (mainly ours) was sloshing about in the storage tanks of the Middle East at that time, not to mention that even more was being hurriedly syphoned off into the pockets of the multi national Oil Barons.

I know it’s easy to poo poo conspiracy theories, but in the quieter moments when you allow your mind to dwell on such possibilities. doesn’t it seem we are all being manipulated like the puppets we are.

All these major changes made in the name of progress, all the Mini Wars the grand schemes to conserve the planet, carbon footprints, solar heating, insulate your loft, we will get you government grants to pay us with. Private finance to build public buildings and on and on ad nauseum.

Who ends up with the cash and the comfortable seat in the sun in The West Indies? Certainly not you with your gold plated pension. ( I have a gold plated pension, it is based on pay rates from 1978 and ‘someone’ keeps taking twenty percent in tax whilst Mr Tesco and his friends reduce it even more by putting up prices and reducing sizes and quantities of the products I have to buy). Council Tax at forty pounds a week, still no one fills the pot holes in the roads or picks up the rubbish. I take heart ‘though, because Dave has assured me we are all in this together and Winsor 2 will save us from ourselves...Stop propping up failed systems.
This government want to and are privatising the police. Love them or loathe them a privatised plod is allot fucking scarier than the current lot. 

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