Wednesday 12 December 2012

#FutureHistory An Englishman's Lament

Two solar cycles past it was observed;
This Great Britain I know is rainy and gray,
From the lofty heights of Westminster to the estates of scum and decay,
A bygone Empire whose subjects lament the fallen sun,
And bitch about everyone else’s life because they haven’t got one,
Where mothers are afraid to let their children out after light,
So they can keep them watching TV somewhere safe out of sight,
Because “things like that” only happen in the slums and dives,
Shame you never noticed how you fucked your children’s lives,
So we mourn the forgotten morals of Victorian days,
And blame all our troubles on asylum seekers, blacks, lesbians and gays.
You’re proud to be xenophobic (conservative to me and you),
But you still take offence to two simple words like “fuck you”,
So why do you complain if an immigrant has taken your post?
Like it really matters since you gave up the ghost,
So you lament the latest rage of our drug infested young,
Always leaving your own drunken hymn far from unsung,
So now please join with me what ever your class,
I ask you all to stand and raise your scum infested glass,
“This Great Britain I despise for it is repulsive and sore,
This Britain I deny for it is great no more.” ©Craig Mitchell
Viz. during the same era, the emotional response to moral miasma of established rule was shared by wry Northern observers who courted controversy [see APPENDIX]. Behold;
Baxter Basics – an extremely amoral and sexually deviant Conservative (and later Labour) MP who first appeared at around the same time as John Major's Back to Basics campaign, and a transparent statement on the hypocrisy of politicians. Wikedpedea
To see into the future one only need look to the past to understand that when leaders are not fucking us they are fucking us no matter how much they tell us that fucking anyone is bad.

Formally, Conservative MPs are devoted and monogamous. In practice, they are probably at least as sexually active as the rest of the population....Many civilised people would regard all these affairs as private matters of no political consequence. Wellington, Lloyd George, Macmillan . . . what politician, not to mention journalist or newspaper reader, could emerge untarnished if the News of the World Sun on Sunday turned over his or her life? independent source
It may be a manifestation of the lizard gene that there is so much sex and not enough love. Seriously does anything ever change?
The controversy about public service and private morality raged across the nation. The choice was between a man of personal immorality and public service integrity (Grover Cleveland) and one of a model family man guilty of using public office for personal gain (James G. Blaine). Cleveland narrowly won.” Historical Sex Scandals

APPENDIX

The following is copied in full from Wickedpedea as it is subject to the whims of trolls, activists, script writers and obsessive, compulsive deleter's of sacred knowledge.
The comic was reprimanded by the United Nations after featuring a strip called "The Thieving Gypsy Bastards"[19] During the resulting court case, UK newspaper The Sun ran a story revealing that the principal Roma man who initiated the action against them was in fact also being tried for (and was later found guilty of) handling stolen property. In the same issue Viz ran a short strip called "The Nice, Honest Gypsies", featuring a kindly Gypsy woman selling pegs door-to-door and helpfully returning forgotten change.
The strip "Wanker Watson", a parody of the children's comic character Winker Watson, led to litigation by D. C. Thomson & Co. Ltd, the owners of the Winker character. In retaliation, Vizfeatured a new character called 'D.C. Thompson The Humourless Scottish Git'. D.C. Thomson then sought revenge by publishing a new cartoon "The Jocks and The Geordies", a revival of an old strip from The Dandy, in which the Geordies (clearly representing Viz) competed with the Jocks (clearly representing Thomson) in a competition to design funny cartoon characters. The Geordies' miserable efforts bore sharp similarity to actual Viz characters, such as 'The Boy with Big Pants' - a reference to Felix and his Amazing Underpants. (Chris Donald's book Rude Kids: The Inside Story of Viz, notes the good-humoured nature of the latter stages of this episode).
Sports clothing manufacturer Kappa insisted that the comic drop the name of one of its characters, "Kappa Slappa", as it had no permission to use the brand name. Kappa also believed that the character in question insulted its customer base. "Slapper" was an obnoxious, uneducated, highly unattractive and sexually promiscuous 14-year-old single mother living on a Tyneside council estate, always donning her Kappa shellsuit. After several runs of the strip, Viz agreed to change her name to "Tasha Slappa".
In his book Rude Kids: The Inside Story of Viz, Chris Donald mentions that he was interviewed by police after giving the go-ahead to publish a Top Tip which could have been interpreted as an incitement to carry out a bomb plot. Donald claims that he then accidentally included the offending statement in that year's Viz annual, and had to have it covered with a sticker by the publishers.
Trinny and Susannah threatened to sue the comic after being portrayed as school bullies in a cartoon strip (Fat and Skinny: Suzanna and Trinny). An official Viz spokesman said “We are too busy laughing to comment”.[20]

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