To combat ever dwindling church goers and the increasing march of naughty brown people prostrating themselves before Allah, the Church of England has finally grown some Cojones and:
The Very Rev Christopher Lewis, the chairman of the Association of English Cathedrals, welcomed the proposals. "We have to be willing to embrace change to keep places going," he said. "As long as it's done carefully, wine bars are a good idea as they bring people in and are a good meeting place."
Not that this hasn't happened before, it's usually under the guise of a social club where the priests could get utterly plastered with parishioners as they congregated at the bar. But that was just for the devoted red nosed few, these new proposals are bringing alcoholism to the masses.
Why are the media not in uproar over this blatant encouragement of binge drinking, even if it in the name of Jesus? Could it possibly offend middle-class sensibilities that God fearing (not loving) church goers could be piss heads as opposed to the lower class louts vomiting outsides Weatherspoons?