The Smut on Sun[day]

The Sun[newspaper] has decided to desecrate* the holy day of Sun[day] shopping by covering it in shit. The Sun[god] was very unhappy with this and made it's displeasure known at the sacrilege;

A magnetic filament snaking over the sun's northeastern limb rose up and erupted during the early hours of Feb. 24th...The eruption split the sun's atmosphere creating a "canyon of fire" 

Modern Warfare 3 Now It's Political

Would the Honourable Member like the Tea Bag in or out?
Dedicated to those in the Battlefield of Modern Warfare
and Freedom loving Monkey's Everywhere

I have made a hypothetical reconstruction (see above) of what Tom Watson may or may not have wanted to do with his honourable member after Keith Vaz. Vaz is the High Priest of the Forces of Censorship and made an open Declaration of War when he tabled a motion in protest against Modern Warfare. This immediately offended the wealth and fanatical dedication of a small country. The People of #MW3 number in their millions and are growing (and learning) fast. According to the latest sources they have a fanatical hardcore of 3 million, General Watson knew how many stood behind him, so he picked up the motion and fashioned his response before hurling it back: